Welcome to Catnip: Northwestern’s Purr-eminent Source for News (Sort Of)
Nobody really knows where Catnip came from. Some say it started in the basement of Norris, others swear it was born from a late-night rant in the depths of Reddit. What we do know is this: Catnip is Northwestern University’s newest parody news site—created by nobody, run by nobody, and written by…well, whoever “nobody” is. Like your roommate’s sourdough starter, it just appeared one day and now it won’t go away.
Catnip exists for one reason: to make Wildcats laugh until they question their life choices. If you’re here looking for serious journalism, try Medill. If you’re here to cry laughing, snort laughing, or possibly pee your pants laughing (please not in Mudd Library), you’re in the right place. We roast campus life, celebrate chaos, and occasionally report on imaginary scandals with the accuracy of a campus tour guide on autopilot.
New stories appear whenever our anonymous writers decide to skip class or get caffeine poisoning—so check back often. Whether we’re covering the latest Greek life “innovation,” the ongoing battle between squirrels and bikes, or the economics of how nobody actually knows what Flex Dollars are, we promise one thing: it’ll be stupid in the smartest way possible.
Yeah, there used to be some other Catnip produced by the Northwestern News Network. But that was video and this, uh, isn’t. That was serious and this, uh, isn’t. And they haven’t done $hit since like 2019 which doesn’t count because covid reset everything.
So grab your Purple Pride, lower your expectations, and join us in embracing the absurdity that is Northwestern. Because at Catnip, we’re not just a parody news site—we’re a lifestyle choice you’ll regret telling your parents about.