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Style Oct 30, 2025

Brandy Melville Announces Bold New Partnership with Ozempic — “One Size Fits Fewer”

LOS ANGELES, CA — In a collaboration no one asked for but everyone saw coming, minimalist teen clothing brand Brandy Melville announced a new partnership with pharmaceutical giant Novo Nordisk, the maker of Ozempic, in what the…

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News Oct 30, 2025

Stressed-Out Northwestern Junior Mauled at University’s Newest Cat Café After Midterm-Induced Meltdown

EVANSTON, IL — What began as a wholesome stress-relief initiative ended in chaos Tuesday afternoon when Northwestern University junior Emily Davenport was reportedly “lightly mauled” by a pack of overstimulated felines at the school’s newly opened “Purrington’s…

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Around Campus Oct 30, 2025

Catnip. Not just for breakfast anymore.

Welcome to Catnip: Northwestern’s Purr-eminent Source for News (Sort Of) Nobody really knows where Catnip came from. Some say it started in the basement of Norris, others swear it was born from a late-night…

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